still don't feel like sleeping...

yes, beckie my dear. presents will hopefully be a plenty for you, as long as my cash flow permits. -grins. i'm still a bit nervous though.

while sending jason home this afternoon, i realized that it will be the last time i see jason till god know's when. our holidays don't fall on the same dates and we might not even be coming back to kk next year. -sighs. it's hard to find a real guy friend like him that i can really talk to. i'm goin to miss him and all his screwed-up relationship problems. haha~ joking my dear! hope you take care of yourself. see ya when we become lawyers, no?

speaking of which, i think i'm goin to change my course preference to bachelor of law. i know, i know. it's so last minute now of me to change my mind again. but i can't help it! sat down and talk to dad and he gave some pretty good advice that he should have given BEFORE i finished mufy. hope it's not too late now.

today was somewhat a class reunion with around 10+ people. it was nice to see them again but i guess it was like what someone said,

i don't really miss them so maybe that's why i don't really mind not meeting them.

i know it sounds bitchy and cold-hearted but i guess i would rather spend some more quality time with my family and the friends that are dearer to my heart. friends that spend hours and hours gossiping with me on the phone, friends that i know i can trust, friends that make me laugh like mad, friends that help me out when my mom starts digging for dirt(!!), friends that knows when to offer me advice when i need it and when to back away when i need time alone. i'm lucky to have friends like that. i don't need to name names to let you know who you are. ^^

there's this bloody song that hitz.fm keeps playing and i can't find the name and the singer for 3 whole days till 1 minute ago. i had to listen carefully to bits and pieces of the lyrics and google it. made so many mistakes that i only finally found it on my 4th try. the song? switchfoot's dare you to move.

flying off today!! can't sleep now~

anyway, chrys, i will call you when i get back k? muaks... miss ya.

I'M GOIN TO HONG KONG ON THE 30TH OF THIS MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which means the day after tomorrow!!! i can't wait. i'm so excited. i finally can see my baby. ^^v

I'M BORED, FCUKING BORED OUT OF MY MIND.

coming home is relaxing and all but there has to be something i can do to fill up my time. you see, i can't work cuz i might be goin to singapore on the 13th of jan. so all i do is stay at home or go out. and goin out is no fun either. there's nothing to do unless you have something you wanna buy. -sighs. it's not helping that i miss my baby so much. i know i'm in love but this is too much!!

anyway, i had this stupid fight with my baby last night. i must be pms-ing or something cuz my mood was extremely foul. called him up and i started being bitchy and all. but there is a reason why he's my baby. he let me bitch and scold and accuse him of preposterous things then he told me he loves me and i should just chill. -sheepish grin. what would i do without him?

everyone plays the hand they're dealt
and learns to walk through life themselves
not everything in life is handed on a plate
when people think your words are true
it doesn't matter what you do
i sold my soul to get here
how 'bout you?
-staind-

went to the dentist today and she sucks. she isn't my regular dentist but i decided to pay a visit to her cuz her clinic was near my house. what bad judgement on my part. when i washed my teeth in the past, it never hurt and my gums won't bleed like i'm a bloody vampire after a blood-sucking meal after the wash. i know i'm suppose to bleed but this is overboard. but she did give me a good advice on how to prevent further excessive bleeding from my gum when i brush my teeth;

use kid's toothbrush

oookaayy... so i bought this cute lil' toothbrush that has a rubberized handle with some cat like patterns and is bright pink and green in color. haha. bet no one would steal my toothbrush now.

bored again. hope jason is free to go out tomorrow. need his help in buying stuff for my baby.

speaking of my baby, i miss him so so so much. >.< i'm on my 4th IDD card now. i give good business to TELEKOM. they should make me their customer of the month. hehe...

shouldn't dwell on the past. it will only hurt our already rocky relationship. if only i could practice what i preach.

shopping with jason can be an intruiging experience. went into a bookshop and he was flipping through a book about bonsai. then he decided that he want to look for some bonsai right there and then. so i was wondering where on earth can you locate a real bonsai in cp. not until he brought me to an electrical shop that sells not only radio,tv etc but also bonsai. - -" now that's what i call multi-tasking.

the funny thing about this conversation is that the person i'm chatting to is a guy. he never cease to amaze me with his actions.

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN is kxxxxx (i thought it would be better to keep him anonymous here, but those who had this nickname on your list, you know who he is -grins)
::kiki >3< :: is me

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
fews days ago i bought pregnancy test in pharmacy..

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
the woman there lookin at me

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
haha

:: kiki >3< :: says:
WHAT??

:: kiki >3< :: says:
u buy for wat??hahahaha

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
test wether i pregnant or not..

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
just play play..

:: kiki>3< :: says:
don be stupid la!!!!!

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
the instruction there says.. put it into the urine stream..

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
kakaka

:: kiki>3< :: says:
then?

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
kuku

:: kiki >3< :: says:
hahahhahaha

:: kiki >3< :: says:
then?

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
i put lo..

Santa ClauS is c0minG to t0wN says:
the result come out negative...

and another one of our latest convo. he changed his nickname though. more obvious now who he is. haha.... though at times, he makes me question my own sanity after seeing our convo.

:: kiki >3< :: says:
u don have other bro and sis?

Yakuza says:
u make my mom pregnant.. then maybe i will have

:: kiki >3< :: says:
only child r

:: kiki >3< :: says:
macam saya

Yakuza says:
only DAUGHTER ar?

:: kiki >3< :: says:
yup yup

:: kiki >3< :: says:
bored to death at home

Yakuza says:
yee so cute...

Yakuza says:
no sibling ar?

:: kiki >3< :: says:
only child how to have other sibling

Yakuza says:
wakaka.. im the king in my family.. u are the queen.. tai hao..

:: kiki >3< :: says:
yes wong tai

Yakuza says:
guard.. bring this woman to the kitchen... steam her... i wan eat steam tai pei...

:: kiki >3< :: says:
guard...this is not my king...cut his head and feed it to the pigs

bought 3 books from the book exhibition over at palm square. finished with the lovely bones, halfway through the catcher in the rye and can't wait to get started on catch-22. relieved that i still have what it takes to finish a novel in under 3 hours. ^^v was a bit worried that my reading 'skills' were a bit rusty after not reading anything other than compulsory study guides and fashion magazines for the past year. i should be even more worried about my state of english now that i think about it. i originally thought that goin to melbourne would improve my english tremendously. not only did it not improve my vocabulary as much as i had hope, i successfully managed to cause my engwish skweel to detiwioawate.... haha... not only that, my mandarin is less fluent now thanks to me speaking cantonese on a daily basis in melbourne. -sighs. the perils of leaving your safe abode for an unfamiliar territory.

anyways, i hope jason now what is he doin. no time for regrets when all is said and done, ok?

calling my baby everyday is making a dent in my wallet. but that is something i find worth spending my money on. although at the end of the day, it does not look worth it when you look at the number of IDD cards i have strewn all over the room. i wonder if chrys ever had the same kind of situation before.

anyway, my dearest mom is starting to show some similarity to felix in the sense that her handphone has over RM200 in credit. - -" i swear, she doesn't use her handphone for anything except receive calls. so on the day i arrived, she told me "yeen (that's what my mom calls me), don't use your handphone. help me finish using my credit first." so there i sat thinking, how the hell am i suppose to use up RM200 before she has to reload the next time. then it hit me. long distance call!! muahahahaha... don't fret. i'm not calling him using her handphone everyday. i'm merely calling him using her handphone till the sum goes down to a more reasonable looking number.

bored bored bored. i guess it's obvious how fcuking bored i'm by the number of times i update my blog. was so bloody bored that i called dino in kl for a chat. we sure have a lot to catch up on. chatted with chrys briefly too. miss her so much. >.<

currently hooked onto love psychedelico's last smile.

btw, merry christmas everyone!!! hope no one is as bored as i am. -grins.

i don't know why but i have been less trusting of people. maybe it comes from the part of me that's growing up emotionally. maybe it's just what i have went through all these years. trust. that's not something i have enough inside me right now. is it suppose to be a good thing? or is it goin to make things worse? time will tell.

i'm half bored to death already. my daily routine goes something like this...

• wake up
• lunch
• online/tv/out with friends
• dinner
• tv
• call my baby
• sleep

with the exception of waking up at 4.30am to go jogging every monday,wednesday and friday. such a sad life that i lead. >.<

ethan, have i ever told you what moisturizing... ahem, i meant mesmerizing, eyes you have? haha~ inside joke...

finally bought the tmnet prepaid thingy to go online. for the first time in my whole entire life, i thank god for 56k!! 56k is better than no k. it feels so nice to be able to sign in my icq, msn and surf the net at the same time. ^^v

saw this guy at the amusement zone at centre point dancing on the dance dance revolution machine. nothing surprising there. BUT he was dancing with blindfold on and using not only his legs to step on the squares but also his hands. - -" he was goin all the way with actions and spins and micheal jackson like moves. i must say i was speechless. it was a sight to remember.

jason drives like chrystella+lester. this should say it all.

guess what? i actually woke up at 4.30am this morning to go jogging with my mom and one other neighbour at the park near my house. @_@ my mom couldn't believe it when she came knocking on my door and i actually woke up instead of falling back to sleep. that should proved my aunt ru wrong when she bet that i wouldn't be able to sacrifice my sleep to go jogging. HAH! -grins.

i finally solved the mystery of why ethan never update his blog anymore. although technically, i didn't solved it, he told me and it's not really a mystery so... anyway, the cause of him neglecting his blog is all thanks to...

CHRYSTELLA aka THE BLOG STALKER!! (credit given to ethan for giving her this name)

apparently, she goes around to people's blog and starts speculating on what people wrote. people as in ethan and maybe the rest of us but who knows for sure. i must admit that i went a bit blank when he told me why. i mean, isn't that the function of a blog? but hey, it's his blog so it's his say. come to think of it, he did mentioned me and beckie doin something similar to chrystella with his last post regarding his "best friend". muahaha...

my baby nephew is coming over soon. my mom has the task of being a babysitter today. he's cute but just like any 1 year old kid, he still can't really grasp the meaning of 'shut up and sit down'.

my desktop and laptop has conspire to drive me nuts. after being such a good and loving owner to both of them, they have both turn against me. aarrgghhh!! my laptop can't detect that i'm online and i can only connect to ICQ on my laptop. my desktop on the other hand does not let me bloody change the language input options for some weird unknown reason. not to mention that my dad has refused to apply to streamyx. >.<

things are still in it's first stage of planning now but i just might be able to go to hong kong!! i'm trying not to keep my hopes up high yet but my mom has given me the greenlight. now i only have to ask my dad. BUT... i will be goin with my parents. however, if i really get to go, i don't care who i'm goin with. i just know that i will be able to see my baby!!!

please GOD!! help me... i really wanna see him. -pouts.

chrys is only coming back in jan and my dear sister dino promises to come back before the new year. my dear dino, i will be dead of boredom then!!!! get your ass back here ASAP!!

i'm back home for less then a day and you know what is killing me already? the bloody heat and my 56k dail up internet connection. yes, you heard it right, 56k modem. fcukstrated does not even come close to how i feel right now. i so wanna throw that damn modem to my dogs. thinking about applying to streamyx is not much use. mom and dad does not even use the home computer to go online, why would they apply for streamyx just for me, just for the 2 months i'm back.

spent the last few days in melbourne goin to crown and doin some shopping. watched ocean's twelve and lemony snickets' a series of unfortunate events. both very nice movies. the later was a bit dark and disturbing but it was good nonetheless. shopping-wise, bought some stuff for william's sis and mom. she thanked me on the phone just now! i'm pleased. -grins. doin big time sucking up to his parents now. i can't wait to go back in february and see him again. 56 more days to go!

i'm feel tired from the plane ride but i'm not sleepy. i feel so bored and restless now that i'm back home. dino, chrys and jason are not here for me to annoy. the only victim left is ethan but he's leaving for shanghai on wednesday. -sighs. i don't like being home at all. i miss my baby like crazy. if i go on, i'm goin to sound like a boyband's love song. i miss him so bloody bad. shame to say, i burst into tears on the plane ride from melbourne to kl. not to mention when he phoned me when he stepped on the plane, at the sound of his voice, i completely lost it. -big sigh. i hate doin the long distance thing. i miss him yet i can't trust him. yet i'm giving him chances after chances cuz i love him. love... it will be the downfall of me.

but i will take a leaf out of ethan's book and try to look forward to other things so that i will be occupied. for instance, the singapore trip with the gang. 13th of jan 2005. hope it will be fun.

christmas this saturday. i used to love christmas. but this year, i can't seem to feel any christmas spirit in me at all. i wish i was back in melbourne. maybe i would be less down. speaking of christmas, william got me this really really adorable teddy bear. it's the cutest mutilated deceased teddy bear in the whole world! heard of teddy scares? well, if you haven't, here's how it looks like. be sure to check out the 3 fake cockroaches that comes with it. it's so cool.




i think this liking for goth must have rub off on me from daniel. i miss that girl. i love the way she used to be so kawaii and suddenly she goes punk and now goth. almost every type of style suits her. she's so lucky.

called up ethan, lorien and beckie just now. was bored to tears. annoyed ethan for an hour or so before managing to convince him to sell me his used IDD card. i'm so desperate that i need help. called my baby but he was asleep, so i made some small-talk with his mom. i wonder what is he up to now. i realized i need serious help. almost every thing i do and say concerns him. anyway, lorien always manages to make me feel welcome when i come back. no wonder she's my mommy too. she and beckie definately can brighten up my day. >3<

gotta go buy my phone and camera charger. i lose everything! dad will be getting very pissed off at the rate i'm losing all my things.

such a long post today. sorry if i bore you guys to death. but i AM bored to death and you should know, misery loves company. -grins. tata guys!

submitted my final result to melbourne u. i don't think i will be goin to melb uni even if they accept me since i can do a double degree at monash. but since i applied before, i guess i'm curious to know if they accept me or not.

should start doin my last minute gift shopping before i head for home. i have already bought stuff for aunt ru and justin only. justin's gift was easy. he made it very clear to me when i went back in june what he wanted.

"jason even remembered to buy me the uk edition of FHM. you ler?? hai..."

so my dear perverted friend, you will soon be the proud owner of the december issue of australia's edition of FHM which comes along with a free wallet.

me and william has been utilizing sean's kitchen to the fullest. it has been fun cooking even though i have no idea what i'm doin half the time. it's just trial and error all the way. ^^ and i'm very happy to say, he cooks most of the time. muahahaha... it's nice to have someone cooking for you. some of the dishes he attempted posted below. very basic stuff but it's the thought that counts. -grins

results are out!!! i got accepted into bachelor of arts in clayton. BUT i changed it to a double degree; bachelor of arts/bachelor of law. why? i have no idea. i never thought about changing it. however, i was bored out of mind while waiting for william to change his campus so i thought "what the heck?" and went in and ask the nice lady sitting there if my marks were good enough for a double degree. after some checking, she happily informed that i could do a double degree if i want to. so in the spur of the moment, i decline my original offer and here i am with a double degree course. i actually don't know if i can manage but i'm willing to give it a try. so wish me good luck!! ^^v

my marks were what you would categorized as good but could be better. 3 high distinctions, 1 distinction and 1 credit. no prize for guessing what i got credit for. >.< was glad that my chemistry exceed my expectations. the rest were expected. btw, congrats to indu for getting 5 high distinctions and being on of the top students in MUFY!

got AUD$980 back from the shithole hostel. more than i expected considering how stingy they can be. i can't believe they deducted $20 for assembling back the bloody bunk bed! wtf! not only that, we (me and beckie) apparently are missing a lamp. -0- took some avant grade postcards for hinching. you better be thankful cuz i had to wait for someone to come out and rush in since i don't have my beepy thingy anymore. the girl was laughing as she saw me dash up the stairs when i heard footsteps coming down. - -"

i hope everyone else received good results. best of luck to you guys. hope to see you all next year in melbourne!

mom has been asking questions about william. not a wee bit surprised though. but anyway, beckie, i owe you one. come to think of it, i owe you more than one. -grins. ^^

results' coming out on monday!! time to start freaking out. i can't believe my whole future will now rest on this piece of paper. i hope it's not that bad.

still watching hunter x hunter. planning to transfer the whole series from sean's desktop to my laptop. then i can indulge in my obsession even when i'm back in kk. muahahaha.... speaking of jap anime, does anyone knows if final fantasy: advent children is out yet? or when is it coming out? there seems to be minimal news on it. even if it came out already, i'm clueless about it.

i cannot believe i'm obsessed with a 12 year old kid. no, he's not a real kid so you don't have to question my taste in guys. however, he's an anime kid from hunter x hunter so you really should question my sanity. -sheepish grins. but he's so cute and bloody cool!! you see, he's an assassin. that's why he has that bad boy thing goin on but he's still 12. so it's like a clash of cuteness and coolness and the outcome is, how should i put it, breathtaking? nay, sounds like i'm describing a scenery. but he's so fcuking captivating. i'm so goin to name my son after him. haha. when i told william that, he was close to fainting.

time sure flies. 12 more days and i'm goin home. i miss the food back home, as always. i'm all about eating and sleeping. -grins. can't wait. but 2 months without him. can i trust him? i hope so. relationship is all about trust, isn't it? so i'm goin to take it easy and tried not to get pissed off. hope that he knows he can trust me.

been hooked on hunter x these few days. 92 episodes in total and so far i have only reached episode 28. still a long way to go. gambate!! hehe... ^^

still tired and pissed off. nothing much has changed. still the same old situation. finding it hard to trust anymore. as the saying goes; once bitten, twice shy. who's to be blame? hard to say.

sean's modem is a pain in the ass. the internet connection is so unstable that you have to reboot the modem at least twice in a hour before you can go online again. but once you're signed in to a program i.e msn or online game, the internet connection does not affect you one bit. one you're online, you will be online till you shut down your computer. freakin weird modem.

watched team america:world police just now. it's a fcuking lame and hilarious movie. coming from the director of south park, i'm not surprised at it's crude joke and overused of the word "fuck". and you gotta see the sex scene between 2 puppets or marionettes(spell?). it's so bloody lame. i can't believe there's people out there who can come up with ideas like that.

was looking through the cds on sell at crown. i just realized i bloody miss my MTV!! i wanna watch ASTRO. have been deprived of music for a long time. only source of entertainment i get is downloading that 70's show from the net and songs from kazaa. i wanna watch videos! >.<

anyway, beckie, you look nicer with your new hair style/ colour/ whatever else you did to it. makes you look younger. more like my sister now then my mom. haha. thanks for your concern too. one word of caution: never date hongkies if you value your sanity. haha~ txai jien gave me the exact warning albeit a few months too late. -sighs. at least i learnt something from it. and i can't say that i didn't enjoyed myself. so i guess there's its downs and ups. still do love him though. that's all that matters, isn't it? you have known me the longest(not forgetting jien). you know how crappy i'm when dealing with relationship and how i can't resist eye candy. -sheepish grins. so sue me...

broken this fragile thing now
and i can't, i can't pick up the pieces
and i've thrown my words all around
but i can't, i can't give you a reason
i feel so broken up
and i give up
i just want to tell you so you know

mom's call woke me up this morning. or more correctly, this afternoon. gave me her permission to go to singapore. apparently she phoned chrys to ask her about the details. - -" never gonna doubt my mom's like and trust for chrys anymore. she trust me with that crazy girl so much. if only she knew what a dangerous driver chrys is. hinching will definately agree with me on this. muahahaha. -evil grins. anyway, when i go to singapore, nelson, you better be there at the airport waiting for me with a red carpet rolled out. haha... -grins.

finally moved everything out of the hostel. i can't believe how much rubbish i have in my room. i'm seriously wondering how i'm goin to move all my stuff from sean's house to my new place next year. probably need a huge ass van for that.

online games are full of weird people. i have a 15 years old kid asking me to be his wife. - -" keeps begging and asking me does age matters and does the character level matters to me. both my age and character level is higher than him, 19 and 105 respectively. then he has the nerve to ask me if he is annoying. how am i suppose to answer yes to that question? sheesh... these poeple are taking advantage of my nice nature. >.< another guy is asking to be his real life girlfriend. yikes! he thinks i'm a hongkie. at least there are other normal nice people that i can chat with.

weather has been hot. i don't like it. and it has been raining for 2 days straight. >.< come to think of it, the weather kinda reflects my mood. i'm pissed yet depressed. i feel like locking myself in the room and just sit there. i need time to myself. i want to just sit there and let my mind wander off. i don't want to think. let my brain rust for a while.