i'm back home for less then a day and you know what is killing me already? the bloody heat and my 56k dail up internet connection. yes, you heard it right, 56k modem. fcukstrated does not even come close to how i feel right now. i so wanna throw that damn modem to my dogs. thinking about applying to streamyx is not much use. mom and dad does not even use the home computer to go online, why would they apply for streamyx just for me, just for the 2 months i'm back.

spent the last few days in melbourne goin to crown and doin some shopping. watched ocean's twelve and lemony snickets' a series of unfortunate events. both very nice movies. the later was a bit dark and disturbing but it was good nonetheless. shopping-wise, bought some stuff for william's sis and mom. she thanked me on the phone just now! i'm pleased. -grins. doin big time sucking up to his parents now. i can't wait to go back in february and see him again. 56 more days to go!

i'm feel tired from the plane ride but i'm not sleepy. i feel so bored and restless now that i'm back home. dino, chrys and jason are not here for me to annoy. the only victim left is ethan but he's leaving for shanghai on wednesday. -sighs. i don't like being home at all. i miss my baby like crazy. if i go on, i'm goin to sound like a boyband's love song. i miss him so bloody bad. shame to say, i burst into tears on the plane ride from melbourne to kl. not to mention when he phoned me when he stepped on the plane, at the sound of his voice, i completely lost it. -big sigh. i hate doin the long distance thing. i miss him yet i can't trust him. yet i'm giving him chances after chances cuz i love him. love... it will be the downfall of me.

but i will take a leaf out of ethan's book and try to look forward to other things so that i will be occupied. for instance, the singapore trip with the gang. 13th of jan 2005. hope it will be fun.

christmas this saturday. i used to love christmas. but this year, i can't seem to feel any christmas spirit in me at all. i wish i was back in melbourne. maybe i would be less down. speaking of christmas, william got me this really really adorable teddy bear. it's the cutest mutilated deceased teddy bear in the whole world! heard of teddy scares? well, if you haven't, here's how it looks like. be sure to check out the 3 fake cockroaches that comes with it. it's so cool.




i think this liking for goth must have rub off on me from daniel. i miss that girl. i love the way she used to be so kawaii and suddenly she goes punk and now goth. almost every type of style suits her. she's so lucky.

called up ethan, lorien and beckie just now. was bored to tears. annoyed ethan for an hour or so before managing to convince him to sell me his used IDD card. i'm so desperate that i need help. called my baby but he was asleep, so i made some small-talk with his mom. i wonder what is he up to now. i realized i need serious help. almost every thing i do and say concerns him. anyway, lorien always manages to make me feel welcome when i come back. no wonder she's my mommy too. she and beckie definately can brighten up my day. >3<

gotta go buy my phone and camera charger. i lose everything! dad will be getting very pissed off at the rate i'm losing all my things.

such a long post today. sorry if i bore you guys to death. but i AM bored to death and you should know, misery loves company. -grins. tata guys!